Dear diary... (Edited)

Dear Diary, 

    Here I am writing for the 365th time this year. In this last page, I want to tell you about something that I realized today. While I was going through all of your pages, I found out that every word that I wrote revolves around one person. I wrote about how I felt when that person left. All my happy days were when I had the person's smile in my mind. Love, hatred, grief, joy and friendship. At the end of each and every day in my life I came back to you and told you everything about that person.  

    Oh my dear diary, we both know very well who that person is. It was said that I cherished that person but I never believed that. I used to say that that person was just a friend, a really close one. Looks like I was wrong. It's like I was under the spell of that person. A year has passed, but it looks like this compulsion isn't over. It's a curse that I have no idea how to break. When will I be able to break free? Why is it so hard to forget? All the pain is buried deep down in my heart and it still hurts. My dreams are visions of my past and my nightmares are my memories with HIM. I never knew that love would lead to all of these consequences.

Dear diary, 

You know all my deepest secrets and you witnessed all of my smiles and cries. I escape from this cruel world and come to you every day. You were my closest friend and my safe place.  I know that you won't let me down. Let all of my secrets die with you.