Validation
This feeling in the pit of my stomach and I can’t really seem to stay seated for an hour straight
This feeling of guilt that never really disappears. It is stuck with me, always, even in the corners of my happiest smiles it is there.
It is like the world sometimes seems too small and other times too big. I check the mirror once and twice just to make sure that I physically am there.
I still question my own sanity and wonder if I am the only one
The only one who wonders if she is actually present
The only one who wonder if the world still saved a bit of oxygen and water for
The only one who wonders if she still have some sort of place
And despite the certainty of everything a part of me was still a step back, a part of me was still uncertain.
And I just wondered if it is okay to sometimes be uncertain of your own existence
If it is okay to want to prove to yourself that you are alive
That you aren’t a part of a parallel universe to reality
That you aren’t dead and this is just a flashback
That you are a living breathing being
That you think
That you love and feel
But are you really real if you withhold the power to pause and resume your world?!