dating at a young age.

Two weeks ago I posted a topic on my Instagram story for people to discuss and it was “dating at a young age.” Did I expect people to interact? No. But some did and, as I read through what they had to say, it opened my eyes and surprised me as I expected most people to be pro- dating at a young age, but it seemed like people were rather wary about it (?) Anyhow, I’ll share what I concluded in this blog so hopefully, it’ll be as enlightening to you as it was to me!

First of all, most people concluded that dating at a young age nearly never resulted in a long-term relationship. They said it’s a good way to experience new stuff and learn but that the constant failure of these relationships could cause one to become anti-dating and more cold-hearted when it comes to romance. 

To begin with, trying to find a b/gfriend at that age is so draining. Children don’t really grasp the idea of authenticity and how cool it is to be unapologetically yourself, so they tend to follow trends and whatnot to get their crush to notice them. And through this process, they might lose who they are as their own focus is on getting their crush’s attention, worrying whether they're enough for them or not, comparing themselves with other people and so they miss the era of their life where they should explore their individuality and just enjoy being single!

Moreover, at such a young age, people tend to be more childish, immature and, thus, self-absorbed. They think the world revolves around them because they’re still at an age where their parents treat them as such, they don’t understand that when it comes to dating, both parties should equally benefit so the more powerful partner tends to abuse their power and use the other person for their own gain. Though if both partners are equal, a clash in powers may occur causing them both to harm one another and so most relationships at that age become toxic! 

Other than that, let’s not forget the low as heck expectations one has for their partners at such a young age. How many girls have s w o o n e d over how a guy carried her books for her or let her go through the door first, or how many guys thought they were t h e  s h * t when a girl complimented them or asked about how they’re when they were sick? Now, as young adults (or teenagers who’re more mature now) let’s take another look at how these things are simple human decency acts rather than how younger us thought they were all that and more. Like, oml, someone treated you like a fellow human being! How amazing is that!

now back to our normal blog. 

The last stage of all of that; the breakup. At such an age we’re all so petty it’s hilarious, kid you not. It’s agreed that a lot of people end relationships with blocking the other person when they’re young. I’ve seen it. You’ve seen it. Karen who still thinks Hawaii is in has seen it. We’ve all seen it. But another thing is that it was definitely not worth the block tbvh, and another thing this whole relationship wasn’t worth was one's time and emotional labour. 

At this age, you're too young to know the difference between love and lust (yes, I stole this from Need Your Love by Teenear, such a good song, check it out.) But, it’s true! You’re too young to take dating seriously or aim for a committed relationship. You might think this is ageist and age is a social construct relative to time and place, and tho that’s also true, but at our current time and place (thank you globalisation) you’re too young to waste your life on other people. You wanna flirt? Go ahead! Have fun! But remember that your priority at this age is to discover yourself and find out who you are, it’s a life-long journey, but if you don’t start it now, you’ll miss the train and end up with sad memories of your childhood instead of fun ones. So flirt around, get to know people, but don’t get into anything too serious because, honestly, everyone’s saying it’s not gonna end well.