Unlovable
I always stand helpless in front of the idea of love.
Lovers call it a weakness.
My best friend calls it incapability.
My parents call it a phase.
Doctors call it asexuality.
Therapists call it fear.
Does it really matter who calls it what?
Let me tell you about my story with love.
Chapter 1:
His hands were as warm as rays of the sun touching the ground after a long rainy night.
For the first time, I felt those butterflies and the haziness everyone talks about.
Weeks passed the butterflies started to suffocate me and I realised when we met he had a fever that's why his hands were warm.
Chapter one came to an end that day when morning's sky was cloudy and his hands were as cold as ice.
Chapter 2:
Blue eyes.
He was everything I wanted and for once it felt like I am not standing helpless in front of love. Love for once was accepting me and engulfing me.
Only that love was mute.
Love had a lot to say, but his voice wouldn't go above a whisper.
Love is the guy I never stopped writing about even though I never got to tell him or hear from him anything about love.
Chapter 3:
Hey stranger?
Isn't that how it begins in fairytales?
Prince charming.
Tan skin, wide eyes, and nice soft hair.
I can't really tell you where it began and where it ended.
Somehow, it did.
It was as fast as a blink of an eye.
Unreasonable ending and unobtainable beginning.
Ununderstandably beautiful is how I decided to put it.
He was like lightning; stole my eyes, and made my heart skip a beat, but I never got to see him until seasons changed and it was too late.
Lovers call it a weakness.
My best friend calls it incapability.
My parents call it a phase.
Doctors call it asexuality.
Therapists call it fear.
Does it really matter who calls it what?
Let me tell you about my story with love.
Chapter 1:
His hands were as warm as rays of the sun touching the ground after a long rainy night.
For the first time, I felt those butterflies and the haziness everyone talks about.
Weeks passed the butterflies started to suffocate me and I realised when we met he had a fever that's why his hands were warm.
Chapter one came to an end that day when morning's sky was cloudy and his hands were as cold as ice.
Chapter 2:
Blue eyes.
He was everything I wanted and for once it felt like I am not standing helpless in front of love. Love for once was accepting me and engulfing me.
Only that love was mute.
Love had a lot to say, but his voice wouldn't go above a whisper.
Love is the guy I never stopped writing about even though I never got to tell him or hear from him anything about love.
Chapter 3:
Hey stranger?
Isn't that how it begins in fairytales?
Prince charming.
Tan skin, wide eyes, and nice soft hair.
I can't really tell you where it began and where it ended.
Somehow, it did.
It was as fast as a blink of an eye.
Unreasonable ending and unobtainable beginning.
Ununderstandably beautiful is how I decided to put it.
He was like lightning; stole my eyes, and made my heart skip a beat, but I never got to see him until seasons changed and it was too late.
I thought by escaping love I would be putting an end to all the heartache, but love is manipulative and boneless. Love can squeeze in from underneath my bedroom's window at night or pass in front of the class's door like a ghost. Love is too tricky to understand or explain. Love is undeniably ugly in the most beautiful way.