beyond pain
To be honest, my perception of pain is flawed. Maybe I feel pain when I notice your cold fingerprints staining our coffee table, unique just like snowflakes with their like-no-other curves and edges.
Is pain the repressed sob that I kept to myself every night after we got separated? It brings me more relief than going back to where we were... maybe that's not a bad thing after all.
I would be kidding myself if I said that I like being lonely. However, alone, which may have seemed tolerable once, isn't the same. Once I got a taste of what your warm presence felt like, everything felt charmless, just like a foggy evening after a long day, even when your favourite song is on.
Have you thought about those pesky little brain films called memories, where you appear alive as ever? My head adds some shine and focus for dramatic effects, which I have now come to realise. Is pain the stab I feel, then? The racking in my chest whenever I remember?
I trained myself to receive those pangs as if they cause no harm. Sharp, erratic, but still very familiar. Shockingly, it is all I remember, as the delicate features of your face fade away from my memory.
Maybe, I forgot what pain was like... because it became a norm.
Is pain the repressed sob that I kept to myself every night after we got separated? It brings me more relief than going back to where we were... maybe that's not a bad thing after all.
I would be kidding myself if I said that I like being lonely. However, alone, which may have seemed tolerable once, isn't the same. Once I got a taste of what your warm presence felt like, everything felt charmless, just like a foggy evening after a long day, even when your favourite song is on.
Have you thought about those pesky little brain films called memories, where you appear alive as ever? My head adds some shine and focus for dramatic effects, which I have now come to realise. Is pain the stab I feel, then? The racking in my chest whenever I remember?
I trained myself to receive those pangs as if they cause no harm. Sharp, erratic, but still very familiar. Shockingly, it is all I remember, as the delicate features of your face fade away from my memory.
Maybe, I forgot what pain was like... because it became a norm.