Do tv shows make me happy?
“So Lydia,
what did you do all week?” Doctor Veronica, my therapist, asked with a tilt of
her head as she kept tapping the pen repeatedly on her notebook.
“I finished a
season of pretty little liars,” I answered honestly, still staring at the white
ceiling.
“Don’t you
think it’s a little depressing to spend all that time on that?” I laughed
lightly at her statement.
“I am
depressed.”
“Sorry I didn’t
mean it like that.” Dr Veronica sighed before leaning forward towards my chaise
lounge hoping I would look at her and when I didn’t she called my name. “Lydia,
I thought we agreed on trying to find the little things that make you even the
slightest happy.”
I adjusted
myself so I was no longer laying down and raised my legs towards my chest to
rest my hand and chin on them.
“You see,
when I watch a tv show it helps me escape reality and reality is that I’m depressed
so it’s better for me to watch than think about how much I hate life.”
“I see. Talk
to me about pretty little liars then.”
“There’s too
much to talk about, so how about you watching the first season then we can
discuss it next week?” I grinned at her suggestively and I was surprised when
she smiled back. Doctor Veronica rarely shows emotion.
- next week-
I got inside my therapist's office, changed the music that was playing and took a seat on my chair waiting for the 'ding' sound of her phone voice recorder. I got so used to this routine for a moment I felt like a robot, which was a weird thought since they scare the shit out of me.
"Did you enjoy it?" I asked excitedly, not waiting for her to ask how was I doing.
"It is a very intriguing show I must say, yet I don't think it's really appropriate for you." As soon as the words left her mouth, my lips immediately turned into a frown.
"Why not?"
"It's just- it's not even comedic. On the contrary, the characters on the show suffer a lot and go through so much that might affect you emotionally while you're watching."
"Everyone cries at movies and shows." I shrugged.
"That's true but you're supposed to be finding something that makes you smile, makes you happy. What about the show friends?" Doctor Veronica raised both her eyebrows.
I bit my upper lip, thinking of how to phrase the thoughts I had in my mind into words that could possibly make her understand.
“I do love friends but I didn’t feel like watching it these days. It’s always according to how you’re feeling in a certain period of time. Sometimes you need a comedic show when you’re happy to match your mood, other times you need a comedic show when you’re sad to make uplift your mood. When your life starts getting boring you go for tv shows like pretty little liars, teen wolf and shadowhunters. Or when your life starts getting too dramatic and you need to worry more about fictional character’s problems, you feel like these type of shows are right for you at this time.”
I inhaled deeply after finishing my rant, picking up the glass of water next to me to gulp it down. Looking over at my therapist, I was waiting for any kind of reaction to what I had just said but she stayed silent for minutes.
“Did I say something wrong?” I nervously asked.
“No, it’s just that you’re really defensive.” She stated, this time sounding impressed. “Do tv shows make you happy?”
“Do tv shows make me happy?” I wondered aloud, taking her nod as a cue to continue. “Well, they’re the place that I can go to whenever I need to escape from the real world. Occasionally, reality gets too overwhelming that I just need to sit back and put all my feelings and focus on another life than mine. The anticipation that keeps building throughout the whole day until you go back home, nuzzle under the covers and begin the next episode is terrific.”
I took another sip of my glass of water, realising that the highnote of this song that I had become fond of but still didn’t know its name, was almost going to be reached in 3.. 2.. 1..
“Yes, they do. Tv shows make me happy.”
I wouldn’t have been Lydia if my answer wasn’t that dramatic.
I bit my upper lip, thinking of how to phrase the thoughts I had in my mind into words that could possibly make her understand.
“I do love friends but I didn’t feel like watching it these days. It’s always according to how you’re feeling in a certain period of time. Sometimes you need a comedic show when you’re happy to match your mood, other times you need a comedic show when you’re sad to make uplift your mood. When your life starts getting boring you go for tv shows like pretty little liars, teen wolf and shadowhunters. Or when your life starts getting too dramatic and you need to worry more about fictional character’s problems, you feel like these type of shows are right for you at this time.”
I inhaled deeply after finishing my rant, picking up the glass of water next to me to gulp it down. Looking over at my therapist, I was waiting for any kind of reaction to what I had just said but she stayed silent for minutes.
“Did I say something wrong?” I nervously asked.
“No, it’s just that you’re really defensive.” She stated, this time sounding impressed. “Do tv shows make you happy?”
“Do tv shows make me happy?” I wondered aloud, taking her nod as a cue to continue. “Well, they’re the place that I can go to whenever I need to escape from the real world. Occasionally, reality gets too overwhelming that I just need to sit back and put all my feelings and focus on another life than mine. The anticipation that keeps building throughout the whole day until you go back home, nuzzle under the covers and begin the next episode is terrific.”
I took another sip of my glass of water, realising that the highnote of this song that I had become fond of but still didn’t know its name, was almost going to be reached in 3.. 2.. 1..
“Yes, they do. Tv shows make me happy.”
I wouldn’t have been Lydia if my answer wasn’t that dramatic.